Evolutionary Biology and Macs

The last Mac I had ran System 7, codenamed Big Bang for what literally meant “blows up all the friggin’ time“. In other words, this was what I saw five times a day:

Compatible hardware was hard to come by, and the software selection available for Mac, when it managed to run, was also sparse and expensive. So naturally, I trashed the little Apple-cheeked box as soon as I could replace it with a versatile Windows 98 machine.

For about ten years I was in the Macs-are-awful camp. Then everything we love to hate about Windows—security lapses, bugs and politics—got irritating. So I switched to Linux and urged others to follow. But one of my more open-minded friends, who actually tried running Ubuntu, explained laconically why it didn’t catch on: “What the hell’s a compiler, anyway?”

Before I continue my thesis, namely, that Apple embodies the best of capitalistic Darwinism because it evolved to fill this gap, I will preface by noting that Jobs and Gates are actually the same species, as the following diagram aims to scientifically prove:

Genus Nerdus Ricos

Mood	Steve Jobs	Bill Gates
Content
Enthralled…	…By iPod	…By iPod
Cocksure	Showing off the goods	Showing off the goods
Spiritual	Fending Off Vampires with iPod	Praying to Aztec gods
Sexy	Womanizing in the 80’s	Womanizing in the 80’s

Even both their names are plural English nouns.

But back to the point. Ten years ago, we were living in an epoch where good computing was not to be found. And then, in 2001, Apple made the evolutionary plunge. They switched to Unix as the core of the Mac OS, all the while maintaining and enhancing the Mac look-and-feel. Through strategic cross-breeding, Apple has combined what we love about Windows—the idiot-proof user-friendliness—with what nerds love about Unix—security, stability and a shell that makes sense—and topped it off with the best-sellers: shininess, amazing graphics, and various frills; in short: fun. Truly the thoroughbred of modern computing.

Jobs has been doing his research and evolving to what sells. Microsoft, on the other hand, continues to annoy its Windows XP users with spyware (e.g. WGA and Alexa), through prodding hoping to squeeze the last drops of profit from an OS that simply put, no one wants to pay for anymore. The hope is that everyone will continue doin’ it just cause everyone’s doin’ it. Well, there were once a whole lot of dinosaurs, too.

Here’s another 100% scientific diagram, this time of the evolution of the two operating systems:

OS	1998	2006
MS Windows
Mac OS	Trilobite	Fabio

Besides a boatload of neat little features, the Mac OS software and hardware scene has vastly improved to the point where you can do everything on a Mac short of compiling Windows programs (the reason I still have a Windows machine). Now that Mac OS is Unix-based, you can get all the opensource software you can get for Linux: free Gimp alternative to Photoshop, OpenOffice to MS Office, etc.

No wonder Douglas Atkins, the author of The Culting of Brands, uses Apple as a prime example of a company that has unwavering customer loyalty. Evolution has led to Macs being the natural selection.

Note: Don’t bother commenting that Mariya doesn’t know what she’s talking about. She has three PhD’s in evolutionary science from the Southern Baptist Center for Evolution. You can’t argue with that.

Photo credits:
http://www.askstevejobs.com/images/steve_jobs.jpg
http://www.cnn.com/TECH/computing/9810/13/gates.idg/bill.gates.jpg
http://gallery.ipodlounge.com/ipod/albums/userpics/normal_BillGates.jpg
http://www.wired.com/news/images/full/7630571_f.jpg
http://www.rotten.com/library/bio/business/bill-gates/1344175078.jpg
http://www.ruggedelegantliving.com/a/images/Steve.Jobs.2005.jpg
http://83.96.133.160/userimages/060123-107-Steve%20Jobs%201985.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/saint_nate/Billgates.jpg
http://www.tribuneindia.com/2003/20030113/login/it2.jpg
http://www.dld06.com/bill_gates_400.jpg